Lesson learning

It's amazing how awesome I feel after venting. After screaming into my pillow and letting a couple tears fall.

The lesson I'm learning tonight is the same lesson I've been trying to teach myself for quite some time now, and I'm almost there. Not yet, just almost.

Never expect anything, never want anything. NEVER say it.
Also, NEVER say you need something. Once those words leave your lips, you've lost.

Tonight, I lost to myself again. But the difference between tonight and nights in the past were that the standing back up was easier and faster. I guess when you take so many punches, eventually you'll be immune to it.

I've made up my mind to try to go back to the place where I was always at a 6. Where life was peaceful, good, and all was well even when things weren't. Surprisingly, it isn't easy to walk back, but hopefully it'll be easier that when I was walking from there. Back then, I was so strong for myself, and not the least bit vulnerable. I miss those days.

Everyone feels this way at least once in their lives

When you feel like nobody listened to what you said.

Especially the people who matter more, they take it in, and then forget. It's like they never heard it, or maybe they did, but then decided some time later that they don't really care.