I predict.

=(

I am amazed at my lack of discipline, eating so much rubbish during CNY. And it's not even the 2nd day.

So many miracles have happened in the past few days that I cannot not recognise God's love, grace and mercy.

I keyed in data in the day and served yoghurt at night.

Dear God, please give me that job at Focus on the family.

Keying in data was a tad draining but it's an experience I want down in my resume.

Working at frolick later at night gave me time to relax and have fun, and earn money for doing just that! =)

Jeannie and I might have hit target. 7-730pm was crazy hour, frolick was PACKED. No standing space, no sitting space, the floor was covered with either footwear or bags that you couldn't tell the colour of the floor. We just grabbed empty cups to fill and just ran back and forth. FUN. =)

My lovelies came to visit.

I'm at this point in my life where I find myself deep in responsibilities and events I need to remember and take note of.

PANIC ATTACK. Haha.

Oh man I need to unload. So here goes.

1) THE ADULT FARES OMG. I'm sorry this is kinda late but I only activated my adult ezlink card today, I only heard the single beep for the first time today.

TRAVELLING IS LIKE WHOA. I need to gt used to this really.

2) Finding a job. 2 interviews this week. By God's grace, one would be what God has planned for me.

3) Personal goals. Yeah I set some.

4) CG.

5) WL.

6) Fellowship/ support. I feel like what I don't want to feel, deal with, is coming back. I hate this cos it cripples you for a while. In that while of time, I can't abandon all duties to rid the stupid feeling either so I am rather dead.

7) Get used to my guard. Still not used to them. I feel like taking it off every few seconds.

I'm tired and want sleep. It's only .30am. I AM SO HAPPY. Thank God for my desire to sleep. Sleeping at 4am these few days kills your body clock really.

OK I NEED SLEEP.

I am a fool for Christ.

I am a fool for Christ.

No matter what people will say, I'm running after You.

Suddenly, the words seem so hard to say.

But why should I let the devil have a hold on me?

Why should I let the devil rake up thoughts I don't want to hold in my mind?

He's able, he's able, I know He's able, I know my God is able to carry me through.

And I realise I need child-like faith, to stand and face the world.

I ran home today.

I felt like my home is where I'm safest, where I won't need to face the world, where I have nothing to worry about.

I pushed the door shut behind me.

But the world is where the people are, where the harvest is plentiful.

I asked God to save me from the world, but it is where I should be.

I need to remember to take every step at a time, in faith.

I need to rely, to remember and to rely on God's strength.

I am a fool for Christ.

I should be happy. I should focus entirely on Christ.

I SURVIVED MY FIRST DAY OF WORK.

How awesome.

Tomorrow I'm bringing a fan and a bottle of water. Hahaha.

Giving out the papers for good money felt awesome. =)

I didn't do much work. Everyone was so nice. The people at sph, the guards and teachers at SAS...

From sph to car, the lady helped me carry the papers.

From car to step outside quard house, lady helped me carry the papers.

From step to guard house, teacher helped me carry the papers.

From guard house to the gallery, guard helped me carry the papers.

How awesome. And Sybs came down to help after she was done with her papers in Zhonghua.

The papers were gone almost immediately. Everyone was like "I want I want!" and before a blink of the eye, they were gone. =) Thanks Sybs! Haha.

I totally slept through my appointment and Sybs appointment at BH. HAHA. Tired.

And then I went to get jabbed.

I tell you, the lady at the counter was like laughing at my stories of how I did not get jabbed before MOB and the doctor gave in and gave me oral medication cos I started crying before the jab. Haha. And the one where the nurses at the hospital were called in to hold me down while the doctor gave me a jab. In P6. Haha.

Eh I TRIED. To psycho myself for a second that it was ok. But when I saw the needle and the vaccination inside the syringe I panicked. The lady came in to hold me and I held Sybil's hand tight.

And the doctor told me not to squirm and repeat " You pain I not pain" (in chinese).

MY ARM ACHES NOW. It hurts. =( I can't lift it or lock it.

I got dance tomorrow, I CAN'T WAIT. SERIOUSLY CAN'T WAIT.

I don't think I'll dance much WITH MY ARM LIKE THAT though, maybe recap a bit. Then go off to work.

AHHHH WORK. SHIZ MAN I'm nervous. HOW. I still have many things I don't know.

FAINTED LAH.

-------------------------------

Daryl's surprise was a flop. Damn. I'm so angry at him for punking me. And I am so angry at myself for allowing myself to make this mission a failure.

It can't be helped since I wasn't familiar with the place. BUT. That's no excuse. I shouldn't have failed. Cheryl cannot fail in acting. I want to refuse to believe I failed but thats the fact. Can't be helped.

I need to chill. And stop being so perfectionist, such a sore loser.

I still hate you Daryl Chee, for you, double priced frolick. HAH.

Haha I'm kidding.

I'm serious about the chilling though. Haha. I really am too competitive.

----------------------------

I think my dad thinks I'm looney.

I cry when my arm hurts.

And then I think about funny stuff like how ruru walked into daddy and fell back like she walked into a wall. Daddy on the other hand, stood perfectly still like nothing happened. HAHA.

And I laugh.

So I cry a minute and laugh the other, cry and laugh.

I think the real world is stressful.

I think I am almost depressed.

I have to get a jab before work.

I AM SO FRICKIN DEAD.

NO ONE SAID ANYTHING ABOUT A JAB.

Help.

Tomorrow I have to be at sph at 11, be driven to work, work, rush home for the people coming.

Tuesday I gotta send in my profile info, get a jab, tell yx, be at frolick at 515 and work.

Wednesday I've got work.

Oh Lord help me.

How can I stand here with You and not be moved by You?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyheJ480LYA

You cannot watch and not cry.

Watch this only when you're ready too, watch this with an open mind and open heart.

I wasn't very tired when I woke up this morning, I was more excited, 3 job interviews. Hohoho.

But then.

All 3 turned out to be disappointments.

The first one needed weekend workers and start in Feb.

The second was nonsense. Maybe I'll regret saying this in the future, afterall, the company IS expanding. But I'm just not into sales and all. Venture E? Nah. Don't think so.

I'll still be giving it a shot though. Tomorrow. Again.

Third. Frolick. Again weekend workers needed.

Too bad I strictly don't wanna work weekends. The pay is higher though.

And I want a job that pays $1000 or more a month.

All that effort travelling Singapore, resulted in like, practically nothing.

I learnt ONE THING.

And that is to NEVER WEAR HEELS if you want to walk around Singapore.

After yesterday in heels, today was a torture.

Now even walking barefooted and pointing my toes are painful.



Happy finding a job, cheryl.

PEOPLE if you know what my 930 rule is about, PLEASE help me stick to it. Hahahaha.

It's only January and I'm totally killing my 930 rule.

Bad bad.

Amazing is how minutes after I posted what I did, I read an email that said that God's faithfulness is forever.

If He was able to provide in the past, He is still able to do so now.

So have faith, just trust. Really. Just trust.

I need a job.

One that allows me flexible hours, non-weekend.

One that pays more than $1000 a month.

My 1st month's pay will be for CBF.

Yay so exciting! =)

Oh Lord You’ve searched me,

You know my way;

Even when I fail You,

I know You love me.

Your holy presence

Surrounding me

In every season,

I know You love me;

I know You love me.


At the cross I bow my knee,

Where Your blood was shed for me,

There’s no greater love than this.

You have overcome the grave,

Your glory fills the highest place,

What can separate me now?



You go before me,

You shield my way,

Your hand upholds me;

I know You love me.

And when the earth fades,

Falls from my eyes,

And You stand before me,

I know You love me;

I know You love me.


You tore the veil, You made a way

When You said that it is done.


--------------------
Yucks heart pain again.

I spent $50 on beads wow.

-------------------

I need to think.

I need to relax.

I need to settle and chill.

I need to follow God.

I need to take every step in faith.

I need help.

I need to have faith.

I need to slow down.

I need to pray.

I need to pause.

I need to focus.

I need a job.

I am talking about 3 things in a few needs.

-------------------

As I hug my laptop to my face, stuggling to hear Joanne's prayer for me over MSN, I feel a sense of comfort and strength.

I feel like I am finally able to be "at peace" for a while, and sleep soundly.

I gotta meet Jeanne and Ian early at 11am tomorrow at which I still dunno where, and it's 330am.

Wowza.

Things to get:

Wii

frames

swimming costume

swimming costume for serious swimming

beads

phone

wallet

backpack

job

I spent less than half the nights in december at home, how fun. I must do it again. HAHAHA.

Camp, Christmas, birthdays, J2 trip, my hope, countdown.

I'm not bored of my J2s yet. Haha.

I'm glad also, that was able to catch up with Jonnie and all. =) Made me realise how much fun they are, missed them INCREDIBLY MUCH.